A Few JOKES!!!!
JUST A FEW JOKES!!!
3 nuns die in a car crash and they go up to heaven and Peters at the gate and he says before you come in i'm afraid you will have to answer a question so he says to the first nun don't worry the questions are very easy so he asks what was the name of the first woman and she says Eve and he says yep your in then he says to the second nun where did eve live and she says Garden of eden and he said yep your in then he says to the third nun which was the mother superior i'm affraid the question is going to have to be a bit harder for you so he asks what did Eve say when she first saw Adam and the nun says ooh thats a hard one and peter says yep your in
As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman." She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?" A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".
How to be obnoxious in Junior high
1)In the middle of class, run to the middle of the room screaming, ''I'm on fire!'' Roll around vigorously. 2) Get up to sharpen your pencil as much as possible. 3) Ask your teacher how good their spouse was last night. 4) Talk in a strong English accent. 5) Walk into class halfway through, saying, ''Aren't you glad I decided to come today?'' 6) In the middle of a lesson, jump up holding a Game Boy above your head and scream, ''I win!'' 7) Pick your nose, show it to your friends and say loudly, ''Mmm, never seen that shape before.'' 8) ''But I have to go reeeaaallly bad!'' 9) During a multiple-choice test, read the answers out loud as you go along. 10) Repeat everything the teacher says in the form of a question (''Sheesh, so America won the Revolutionary War?''). 11) At lunch, insist on being served caviar. 12) Hide in your locker and refuse to come out. 13) ''I was never told there was going to be a test.'' 14) Bring your pet goldfish. 15) Throw chalks at the chalkboard and insist on counting how many pieces it breaks into. 16) Laugh hysterically whenever anybody says anything. 17) Splash water on the armpit area of your shirt and walk around with your hands behind your head. 18) During a private conversation with a teacher, suddenly shout, ''No I will not have sex with you!'' 19) Point and laugh at all the fat kids. 20) Strike up a conversation with your pen.
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